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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27878326">boyfriends, biceps and free wi-fi</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/hoppykawa/pseuds/hoppykawa'>hoppykawa</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!, ハイパープロジェクション演劇「ハイキュー!!」| Hyper Projection Play "Haikyuu!!" RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, M/M, Pining Oikawa Tooru, kuroo is a Good Friend, oikawa is desperate</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 14:55:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,637</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27878326</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/hoppykawa/pseuds/hoppykawa</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"I just need you to promise me you'll bail me out if I get arrested," Oikawa sternly says, trimming his well-kept nails. He's met with a dull expression, and like the drama queen he is, he took it personally. "Tetsu-chaan! Don't look at me like that!"</p><p>"This is such a dumb idea."</p><p>or,</p><p>Oikawa is desperate to get free wi-fi, and Iwaizumi just so happens to be the next door neighbor who actually pays for his network connection.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>59</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>boyfriends, biceps and free wi-fi</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>University <strong>wasn't</strong> as bad as his high school teachers made it out to be. Girls are still flocking to him, his friends are fun, and he's still as beautiful and attractive as ever. It was going all so well. Until he realises the fact that the university required for him to pay his <strong>own</strong> internet bill.</p><p> </p><p>How does that even make sense? Going to the library everytime he had to work on some stupid project seemed- stupid. So, what did Oikawa Tooru, freshly admitted at the ripe age of 19, do to overcome this obstacle? Easy!</p><p> </p><p>Shamelessly mooch off his hot next-door neighbor's wi-fi.</p><p> </p><p>With eyebrows knitted together and a headband with bunny ears crowning his hair, Oikawa concocted a plan to find out Mr-Hot-Neighbor's password. First plan of action, pretending to fix his cable. His momma sure as hell didn't raise an liar, but desperate times call for desperate measures. Guess the acting classes he took at the age of 12 weren't useless after all.</p><p> </p><p>AND, what Mr-Hot-Neighbor doesn't know won't hurt him.</p><p> </p><p>▬▬▬▬▬▬</p><p> </p><p>"I just need you to promise me you'll bail me out if I get arrested," Oikawa sternly says, trimming his well-kept nails. He's met with a dull expression, and like the drama queen he is, he took it personally. "Tetsu-chaan! Don't look at me like that!"</p><p> </p><p>"This is such a dumb idea."</p><p> </p><p>"No, it is absolutely not! I am not paying $30 dollars A <strong>MONTH</strong> for 36 GB of data!" Oikawa slams the nail cutter on the marble kitchen counter, in which Kuroo mumbles a quiet 'careful, that's expensive.' Silence fills the room, much to Kuroo's satisfaction, until a sly look settles over Oikawa's pathetic face-product filled face.</p><p> </p><p>That wasn't a good sign. Kuroo has been Oikawa's friend for what, 2 years? And he has <strong>never</strong> regretted something more than being Oikawa's go-to person. He can't even COUNT how many times he had to rescue this little bitch from so many uncomfortable and just overall stupid situations.</p><p> </p><p>But he's not going to lie. Oikawa is a fun person most of the time. He'd never tell him that though, his ego is almost as big as his stupid shiny hair. Hell, his hair probably is his ego in tangible form.</p><p> </p><p>"Why are you looking at me like that?" Kuroo breaks the silence, narrowing his eyes at the small smirk gracing Oikawa's face. "Don't look at me like that. It's creepy. And, word of advice, take off that stupid face mask. You look like an oompa loompa."</p><p> </p><p>Oikawa clicks his tongue as he reluctantly peels off the orange face mask that was clinging onto his soft skin. Kuroo wonders if the brunette sold his soul to have skin as smooth as that. "I'm just saying, Tooru, you're working way too hard on this stupid plan of yours." Kuroo shrugs, fiddling with one of Oikawa's many moisturizers. What even is this one? '<em>Victoria's Secret Mist Spray</em>'? Why is it so watery? Him and his weird moisturizers. Kuroo abruptly puts the bottle down and stares into Oikawa's eyes. "Why don't you just ask him out and pay for your own wi-fi like a <strong>normal</strong> person?"</p><p> </p><p>"Gah, Tetsu-chan, you just don't know the way of love and the power the internet holds on me, don't you?" Oikawa dramatically sighs, flopping elegantly onto the chair nearest him. "This is my road to a life with a smoking hot boyfriend AND free wi-fi!"</p><p> </p><p>And at this point, Kuroo gives up.</p><p> </p><p>He tried.</p><p> </p><p>▬▬▬▬▬▬</p><p> </p><p>The next day, Oikawa boldly knocks on Mr-Hot-Neighbor's door wearing one of the maintenance person's uniforms stolen from the closet. It stunk, it really did, but the power of love (and don't ever forget the free wi-fi) was a driving force that no pungent smell can ever compete with.</p><p> </p><p>Mr-Hot-Neighbor answers the door without a shirt on.</p><p> </p><p>Oikawa forgets how to breathe. His words caught in his throat, and everything he's rehearsed to say just dissipated into thin air. Instead of his well thought-out lines, something more like a whine came out of his mouth. "..'kawa Tooru."</p><p> </p><p>Mr-Hot-Neighbor's nose crinkle ever so slightly, and Oikawa almost passes out. Maybe it was because of the heat, or the smell. Maybe its because of the fact that MR-HOT-NEIGHBOR HAD SIX PACK FUCKING ABS. AND THOSE FUCKING BICEPS CAN CHOK-</p><p> </p><p>"Sorry, I didn't quite catch that." Mr-Hot-Neighbor says, leaning against the door frame. And suddenly, Oikawa's life goal was to be one with the door frame. How lucky that piece of wood was- to be touched by a hunk of an angel. Does he have a girlfriend? Even worse, does he have a boyfriend? Oh god, please don't have a boyfriend OR a girlfriend. </p><p> </p><p>It's been about a good three minutes since the last word was uttered. The next few minutes were followed by Mr-Hot-Neighbor shooting Oikawa weirded out but concerned looks, as the latter stared at the door frame so intently without blinking. "...Hello?"</p><p> </p><p>"OIKAWA TOORU. PLEASURE TO MEET YOU. THANKS FOR THE CHAT, GOOD BICEPS." </p><p> </p><p>▬▬▬▬▬▬</p><p> </p><p>Well that went well! Not only did he call his biceps 'good', he also tripped on what seemed like a rock while trying to flee the scene. But to Oikawa Tooru, embarrassment is not in his dictionary. He IS getting that wi-fi password and snag that cute coffee date with Iwa- Iwa.. Iwa-chan!</p><p> </p><p>Maybe the first plan didn't work, but there's still hope. And he can't do it alone. It might take days, months, years- but he'll get that password no matter what. It doesn't matter if he gets the password (and the date) on his 65th birthday, cause he is NOT a quitter.</p><p> </p><p>And no one else is more fit for the job than Kuroo.</p><p> </p><p>So in his desperate attempt to mooch off this poor unsuspecting neighbor, he runs over to his phone and dials a long but familiar number.</p><p> </p><p><em>"It's four in the morning." </em>The voice on the line growls, clearly pissed. Does this scare Oikawa? Absolutely not. Over his dead body.</p><p> </p><p>"Mhm, and this is important, Tetsu-chan," Oikawa chirps, skipping around his small dorm kitchen. Rustling could be heard on the other side of the phone; probably Kuroo getting out of bed to run to Oikawa's dorm and finish him off with a good punch in the nose. "..I'm glad you asked why I called! So, about that wi-fi password-"</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>"For fuck's sake."</em>
</p><p> </p><p>"-I decided, it would be more productive to just guess the password!" Oikawa smiles, thinking he's the smartest person in the whole world. (The prettiest AND the smartest? So amazing.) "Whaddya think?"</p><p> </p><p><em>"... You're fucking stupid." </em>Kuroo mumbles, faint footsteps echoing over the line. <em>"It's going to take you forever to find out what this stupid password is, 'Kawa. And I'm okay with helping you, but 3 hours is the most I'll put into this pathetic excuse of a 'plan'."</em></p><p> </p><p>A rush of adrenaline runs up Oikawa's spine as he giddily bounces over to the couch. That password will be his by the end of three hours. Game on, Iwa-chan.</p><p> </p><p>▬▬▬▬▬▬</p><p> </p><p>Snoring. Snoring is all that's coming from the phone. Kuroo fell asleep after only twenty minutes of guessing. And his guesses weren't even helpful. Oikawa was 100% sure that Iwa-chan wouldn't set it as something like 'motherhen123' or 'gawkgawk3000'. </p><p> </p><p>They did have a close lead once, 'iwaizumihajime0610' being an old password. If only he started guessing earlier. Though Kuroo called him creepy for knowing his birthday after two clicks of a button, it doesn't matter. Creepy schmeepy, so dramatic, Tetsu-chan.</p><p> </p><p>Oikawa hums quietly, lips vibrating softly as the beat of some Ariana Grande pop song echoes through the dorm room. He mindlessly types his name in the password box; mainly because he's already given up and his name really is a pretty one. It won't matter anyway, Kuroo was right. It'll take him nearly forever to guess out of the millions and trillions of word combinations Iwa-chan would have chosen. </p><p> </p><p>"Ah, Kuroo, look! I got in." Oikawa chimes in a semi-monotone voice. He hums happily as he quickly uploads his newest selfie onto Instagram. He drops the phone onto the table and stands up to get a snack.</p><p> </p><p>Until he realizes.</p><p> </p><p>Iwa-chan had set his name as his wi-fi password.</p><p> </p><p>"KUROO! KUROO WAKE YOUR ASS UP," Oikawa shrieks, scrambling to yell at the phone screen. "KUROO WAKE UP YOU FUCKING-"</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>"I'M UP. WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU YELLING AT ME? WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME."</em>
</p><p> </p><p>"Kuroo," Oikawa mumbles albeit breathlessly. He didn't know if it was from running fast enough to knock one of his candles on the floor, or if it was the rush of knowing that out of everything, he chose 'oikawatooru'. "Oikawa Tooru. It was Oikawa Tooru."</p><p> </p><p>▬▬▬▬▬▬</p><p> </p><p>If Kuroo was given a choice to eat hair for the rest of his life or watch Oikawa shamelessly flirt with the bicep-hunk, he'd gladly eat every last strand of hair given to him. Oikawa twirling his hair around his index finger is not a nice sight, and he'd much rather be drowning right now than standing in the bushes watching his best friend's relationship bloom. But he wasn't going to lie. The two looked perfect together. Twink + Hunk, you get it?</p><p> </p><p> Kuroo hasn't seen Oikawa all giddy and smiley like that in ages. It might be disgusting, yeah, but as Iwa-something hands Tooru a small piece of paper, Oikawa looks like he was just handed a million dollars. Brown eyes meet hazel, and Oikawa cheerily waves the messily-ripped paper in the air.</p><p> </p><p>He hated relationships. It seemed like such a bother- and he did everything he could to prevent Oikawa from experiencing the horrible pain of break-ups again.</p><p> </p><p>But if Iwaizumi was the one that could make his best friend smile like that, even just for a little while,</p><p> </p><p>then he was willing to make an exception.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi!! im sorry if the story seemed a bit sloppy at the end, i had to rewrite all of that bit cause STUPID ME FORGOT TO SAVE THE WORKHSKWKD UGH</p><p>anyway, thank you so much for reading! kudos would be appreciated:)</p><p>to chloe, thank you for beta reading the first part and for your encouragement into continuing this fic even after i deleted like half my shit. I LOOOVEYOU</p></blockquote></div></div>
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